Tag Archives: men

Why Dating Sucks

Every day I come across something ridiculous online.

Yesterday was no exception. 

I see people applauding the way the situation played out. The vast number of people conveniently over look the actions of the man.

Late is late (huge pet peeve ). I know no one is perfect but if he could call her friend he could call her. If he is master manipulator like this then maybe she dodged a bullet. This “man” was lying before he even stepped in the door. Every action sparks a reaction. He showed up late and instead of giving an honest answer as to why he showed up late and did not call he came up with an elaborate tale. 

Lying is another pet peeve. 
Even if she looked beyond that and he did get to go on the date, how would be explain everything he said was a lie? I’d be out then too.

If i have to teach you being late is rude and lying is wrong before we even start the first date there will be no first date. 

Down the line if she looked past this and found out later after they became a couple he has been dealing with another woman for years and continued to see her while with her and that was the reason why he was late on their first date she should have known better. 
Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. 
So don’t.

Clearly is supposed to be all about him and champion the “no gold diggers” cause…however you get the consideration you give. Prepaid ran out of minutes. There are pay phones. Stores. When there is a will there is a way. If he missed the bus he had the ability to make a call some place. I wouldn‘t even ask why he was late if he called i would ask if he is OK and if we needed to reschedule. If he told me he missed his bus i would offer to come get him. 
See how that works? 
You give you get.

The deepest issue in this scenario is he had a negative view of her to begin with. Why entertain someone you do not respect? Who are you proving a point to? What if she over looked all that and the woman decided to have sex with him? Would he tell her “I think you ain’t shit so I refuse to sleep with you?” No…far too often men find it alright to hang around with women they do not respect creating an attachment he dismisses once he finds someone he actually likes.

The rest of this story goes:
Then the mutual friend called the girl and asked what happened. After hearing the list of lies the mutual friend came to a few conclusions. ..

  • he cray
  • they will never hook him up again
  • he lies 
  • never date any of his friends

Having all of those things listed (nice car and expensive phone) does not make up for not valuing her time.

A wise person once told me you can tell how much a man values you by how he values your time. 

Watch “WHY DONT MEN APPRECIATE A GOOD WOMAN ? – @TopRopeZeus” on YouTube

This is so sad but true. Men often blame women and say they had no idea how to treat or appreciate their man and that’s why men lie or stray.
Black women especially are accused of nagging and being not being supportive when in all reality when a man doesn’t do what he is supposed to do in a relationship and we take the time to say “look, you must come through for us” it’s dismissed and shrugged to the side. A woman can have her own house and car along with a college degree while displaying patience with you and your issues, meanwhile men keep back ups of women who are leaps and bounds below that woman.
Men can have their choice of the baby sitter or fry flipper versus the office worker with a history of upward mobility and try to have both in some capacity.
Now, I’m not going to say all men act like this…but at one point or another I have seen a large percentage of black men I know try to do this.
Don’t stick around to be the training dummy ladies…find the man who has been through that phase and can appreciate a great woman.